Slaying the Dragon that is Trauma Series: A Beast Called Sexual Assault
Sexual assault is a beast all on it’s own. No matter which way you slice it, something is taken from you in that moment that you feel you can’t get back it. Your mind can race into many thoughts like these: “Why didn’t I see the signs before?”, “Why didn’t I try harder to fight back harder?” or “Why did this happen to me?”
Healing After Sexual Assault: Finding Your Path from Victim to Survivor
Sexual assault is a beast all on its own. No matter which way you slice it, something is taken from you in that moment that you feel you can't get back. Your mind can race into many thoughts like these: "Why didn't I see the signs before?", "Why didn't I try harder to fight back?" or "Why did this happen to me?" These questions are a normal response to sexual trauma, but they can also feed into self-blame — a heavy and unwarranted burden that no survivor should carry.
The questions you have related to sexual assault seem to never stop coming and the aftermath of trauma can take a toll on you mentally, emotionally, physically, and relationally with others. Others who love you or care for you may say things like "you're not alone," "this will get better," or something of that nature. You know you hear the words, but you aren't listening because over and over again it doesn't change what happened. The confusion, the fear, the lingering PTSD symptoms — they are real, and they are valid.
But I do have to say, coming from experience with this beast, you do not have to stay stuck. There is a path toward healing, and trauma therapy can help you walk it.
You may see yourself as a victim of sexual assault, or you think the criminal justice system does, but you can become a survivor. Yes, you can do this on your own, but you don't have to — and I don't want you to. Sexual assault therapy is a safe place for you to be brutally honest with what has happened to you, but remember that it doesn't define you. When you are ready, trauma therapists are here.
As I stated, sexual assault is a beast. Your family, friends, and/or significant other may want to help you, but they don't know how — and that's okay. They don't know the pain this comes with, and you don't want them to ever have to know. Go easy on those who want to care for you during this trying time, and advocate for yourself on how you need support.
I want you to know that you are not alone. You may feel like it, and it may appear that way, but you aren't. When it comes to the incident that occurred, some survivors categorize their life before the assault and after the assault — and if you aren't careful, you may feel the same. As I said, we are here and ready to help you navigate this, but we can only help you when you are ready. Please, please don't wait so long that you have lived with this weight on your shoulders and, before you know it, it has stolen many years of what could have been and substituted them with more pain and turmoil than you can bear.
If you came across this post because you have been sexually assaulted, I'm sorry this post speaks to you, and my heart hurts for you. However, I am glad it does — so that you know you have someone in your corner who wants to guide you through this trying time and help you not give any more of your time and attention to your abuser. Please come see me, and if not me, another trauma therapist who can help you. We can create a trauma treatment plan specifically for you and incorporate different evidence-based therapy techniques — such as EMDR therapy (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and ART therapy (Accelerated Resolution Therapy) — to assist you in healing from sexual trauma. Both EMDR and ART use guided eye movements to help your brain reprocess traumatic memories so they no longer feel as vivid or overwhelming, and research shows they can be highly effective for PTSD from sexual assault. Let us help you take your power back and give you peace back.
If you are not ready to see a therapist, that is okay. Here are some resources for you along the way:
The Heights in Midlothian, TX @ 469-672-6351; https://www.theheightselliscounty.org/get-help
Healing Hearts Center of Ellis County @ 24-hour crisis hotline 1-800-828-7893; https://healinghearts-center.org/
Ellis County Children's Advocacy Center (ECCAC) @ 972-937-1870; https://www.elliscountycac.org/
Women's Center (job counseling, rape crisis) @ 817-927-4006; https://www.womenscentertc.org/
National Sexual Assault Hotline @ 800-656-HOPE; https://www.rainn.org/
One Safe Place @ 817-916-4323; https://www.onesafeplace.org/
You don't have to carry this alone. If you're ready to explore healing from sexual abuse and reclaim your sense of self after sexual assault, I'd be honored to help. I'm Lexi Eller, LCSW-S, offering trauma therapy in Waxahachie, Texas and serving survivors throughout Ellis County. Contact me at lexi@emberlighthousewellness.com or by text/call at 972-333-3870 to schedule an appointment today.
— Lexi Eller, LCSW-S
Ember & Lighthouse Wellness | Waxahachie, TX
Trauma Therapy • First Responders • Veterans • EMDR • ART • Texas
References:
ART Vs. EMDR: Understanding the Differences - Choosing Therapy](https://www.choosingtherapy.com/art-vs-emdr/
What Is ART?](https://acceleratedresolutiontherapy.com/what-is-art/)